So here I am on a training day for work. I am so lucky I am not actually at work as I don’t seem to have a memory today. An entire conversation vanished from my mind this morning.

Ita day four of I’ll baby last night she just kept screaming but she had her mess and feed and change and just wanted to be in the bed with me but I was just too tired. I found myself patting her frantically begging her to sleep in a slightly hysterical way. Then at one point I think I practically growled at her. I picked her up and put her down countless times. I hid under the duvet and down the hall. I felt like a shot mother. I stood in front of the door where DH was slumbering earplugs in Ana beamed my anger at him.

Thia morning for the third morning in a row he slept through his alarm because of the earplugs and having his phone on silent duh! I had to get kids dressed medicated and fed within half an hour and I have learnt to apply make up whilst eating toast. He makes their lunches and then sits down to eat whilst I am changing, feeding, packing up breast pump etc.

Ao yesterday I snapped at him and he didn’t speak for the day. Today I tried to be civil but inside I am fuming.

My secret plan is to reset his alarm to loud and early and put in his room out of reach last thing. Watch this space!

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